The night before we went into the hospital I was overwhelmed with anxiety and fear. I had fear of the actual surgery and was overwhelmed with the fact that our family as I knew it, was about to change forever. I knew it would be a good change but I wasn't sure if I had what it takes to be a mother of four and to be a role model to a girl of my own. John gave me a blessing late that night and I felt all my worries subside as I packed my bag for the hospital and picked out clothes for our baby girl to come home in.
John thought that a girl nursery was a little silly since we never had a real decked out room for any of the boys. Sexist, he said. But for some reason I felt the need to do it. My theory...if you build it, she will come. Decorating is not my forte by any means and the nursery still needs some final touches. John and I spent a good three hours trying to hang the pink cluster in the corner so that it looked just right. With a bunch of fishing line and cramped shoulder muscles, we finally got it to work.
2 comments:
I think the room looks so pretty!!
BEAUTIFUL.
Okay I totally hear you on the anxiety about having a GIRL of your own. It's a lot more pressure, right? I think maybe it requires you to come to grips with the woman you are, and be confident to raise another. Scares the hell out of me.
...and the anxiety before the C-section: I remember crying during my 2nd C-section because I didn't think I could ever go through it again. All the anxiety before the surgery about put me over the top!
Boo for C-sections.
You are beautiful and such a strong, wonderful woman. How lucky for Gracie to have you as a mom!
All my loves and congratulations,
MEG
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